"Cien sesenta y tres caballos?" asks the traffic cop, pointing at the K1200R. Rifling through the mental bin my GCSE Spanish has been in for the last 15 years I try and work out what he's saying. I'm roasting like a boil-in-the-bag meal but just as my brain edges toward meltdown, something clicks.
"One hundred and sixty three horses?" is the question. Our man wants to know if BMW's quoted power figure is right. Aha. My linguistic triumph is quickly extinguished when I realise I now need to answer. In Spanish. Bugger. I could book a hotel room, ask for a receipt and almost certainly ask for directions to the station, but explain that BM's power figure is measured at the crank and although probably correct it'll be a lot lower by the time it gets to the back wheel? Not a hope. I resort to pointing at the back wheel and mumbling loudly instead.
Fortunately I'm saved embarrassment by the arrival of the nice lady from BMW who's come to buy my freedom from the roadside I've been detained at for the last hour.
Now, with the K1200R being the joint most powerful bike BMW has ever made, you may assume I had been stopped for riding somewhere near the speed of sound. Sadly the reality was less rock and roll. My crime had been a u-turn, which I now know is illegal in Spain. With this kerfuffle finally straightened out it was time to hotfoot it the 100-odd kilometres back to the hotel.
Sense would suggest that, having just met most of the region's police (who were now aware of where I was going), riding at a restrained pace would be advisable. Well, I managed for about a mile, then it all went to pieces as the incredibly-surfaced roads opened up to carve into the hills ahead.
"The BMW made me do it," is not an alibi I suspect many magistrates have heard before, but in the case of the K1200R it may just become one because this is a very fast road bike. And it's not just fast, it's fun too. Proper knee-down, flick-flacking, 120mph-plus sweepers kind of fun. Blimey.
All this meant the ride back to the hotel was a blinder. Most was spent between 100 and 130mph, rolling the BM on and off the throttle in third and fourth, using the wide spread of smooth, torquey power from the gutsy four-cylinder lump to hurl the 1200R from one flowing bend to the next. Straights were demolished with extra input from the loud handle, resulting in the speedo drifting past 165mph at one point, and when the empty roads did throw up dawdling drivers in the distance any speed removal the ample engine braking couldn't manage was easily handled with a gentle stroke on the anchors.
That this supposed 'naked' bike was able to make the most of its shove is due in no small part to its excellent screen - it allows you to get the kind of stomp on you normally can't on a bike like this. It's not into fully-faired sportsbike territory as the coating of flies on my neck testified, but it's closer than any other naked bike I've hopped on to date.
Continue the BMW K1200R Review 2/2
