Hipsters: How not to live your life
The embarrassing world of trying to be cool
I have to start this piece by stating that I'm not from London. I may work here but I grew up in a remote North Western market town where people were (rightly) suspicious of anything or anybody new.
Back to London. There's a massive two wheeled thing happening at the moment. Hipsters. He's a middle aged, slightly-paunched mid-life crisis looking for somewhere to happen. Maybe late twenties, early forties, he wears slightly too much stubble or comically sculpted sideburns or goatee, is brand obsessed and considers the aesthetics of anything before its practical capabilities.
When he's cycling, he prefers a fixie (yes, no freewheel hub mechanism). These primitive, impractical devices can be seen wobbling around at most red traffic lights in London while their owners' retro-logo satchels momentarily unbalance them.
Sadly, the manufactured urban hipster has recently discovered motorcycling. Metal flake open face helmets with no type approval are de rigeur. Artificially aged leather jackets (or worse still - Belstaff) and Converse Allstars are prevalent. There has been an explosion of useless blog sites where people with no knowledge (or depth of understanding) ponder nothing but the shallow aesthetic of metal flake paint or retro STP patches.
The favoured bike? The most rubbish thing you can think of. Early Yamaha four-stroke twins (XS400, yum, yum) Yamaha SR500s and proper rotters like the dreadful CB500T Hondas. I don't get it. Don't these people realise that there is no irony in what they're doing? I mean, if it was deliberately well humoured it would all be forgivable.
The irony? In their quest to stand out they all end up looking the same. It's also a nice example of how the more effort that's put into being 'cool' has a directly proportional, inverse effect.
That's why I love this animation - it cuts straight to the chase. It may be aimed at American Hipsters but the satirical currency is the same...
Discuss this story
Hey Mark, that´s great, but you forgot to remove the hipster flanellshirt from your profile picture before posting this crap. Remember him talking about flanell, right?
I laugh in the face of you guys who now suddenly feel intimidated by guys who likes to have a motorcycle that actually looks cool, and look cool while riding
Posted: 07/02/2011 at 19:45
SR500 is a cool bike and i still want one.
<-- not a hipster
I think them hipsters are just after the cafe racer cool.
Oh and the SRX600 is also dammed sweet.
Posted: 07/02/2011 at 21:47
Ive had dirtbikes, classic bikes trail bikes, sport bikes, track bikes and race bikes. Ive worn vans and converse trainers for as long as I can remember, I dont live in London, Ive been riding bikes since I was 10 years old. Ive pulled bikes apart and put them back together again, I've ridden thousands of miles in all sorts of weather, had near misses and crashes and carry the injuries still.
I AM qualified to talk in depth about bikes, my day job is bikes, my other job is photography so I like the way things look.
I like xs650's and cb500t's and I like the look of cafe racers and street trackers. Doesnt make me a hipster. Im just a bloke who likes bikes.
Mr Forsythe, you should really get a life, just cos you dont like how other people enjoy their bikes doesnt mean they are wrong.
Posted: 08/02/2011 at 10:07
So what you’re saying is that the hipster scene doesn’t have any real bikers in it? You are a real biker so don’t hang with them, you only post on your blog.
BTW... Your blog is like the best one on the internet.
Posted: 09/02/2011 at 16:09
Erm, someone that rides fat, dog slow, US V twins, like dreadful music, and hits people for fun....
LOL
Posted: 10/02/2011 at 15:34
A real biker:
someone that doesn't go on and on and on about other bikers and why they dont like them, the way they dress, what they ride, their music etc etc etc.
A real biker just rides (all or most weathers), enjoys it, stops for other bikers (inc. scooter or moped riders) if they are broken down or in an accident and basically enjoys themselves without trying to be dicks to others.
The film was quite funny but I really havent seen any of the targets Mark is talking about despite spending a lot of time commuting in london. Wish I had cos they seem a damn site cooler than the average grebo biker ;) :P
Posted: 11/02/2011 at 13:08
There was an article based around the hipster 'demograophic' in the guardian about four months ago.
Christ MF, you're like four months too late with this piece and beside Chris Morris was doing this about ten years ago with Nathan Barley - man there's one brother I'd like to go for a chocolate double whipped latte with and show him some scripts I've punched out on my 11" Air!
Us hipsters have moved on MF - we're now post hip retro-hipster beany.
Man, if you're going to be like, a real cool media guy with a sneering view of the world at least be up to date. Check your ipad twiiter face deck MF - it's like 2011 grebo boy.
BTW - I love the way MF also sounds like motha f¨cka that's so hangin bro ; z
Posted: 13/02/2011 at 07:24
New age fun with a vintage feel...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVmmYMwFj1I
Posted: 16/02/2011 at 19:21
Just get on yer fooking bikes and ride is all i say.
If its purely an exercise of buying the newset shiniest bike and all the branded gear to go with it, thats your choice.
I dont like Harley's because I feel they are poor quality motorcycles, I love italian and japanese as well as british. I dont have an issue what people ride or what they wear really,if I ever poke fun,its in an ironic having a laugh sense.
Each to their own I say, but the best way to experince what the world of biking has to offer is to keep your mind open,do what you feel comfortable doing and most importantly, if you want to wear a flannel shirt, forking wear one. I have them...as well as full race leathers...in the wardrobe where I keep my open face helmet/goggles....and my shiny new shoei race helmet... In the garage next to my old cbr400 race bike... Parked up next to the triumph, the 80's jap hack, the vintage cafe racer and the aprilia RSV. See what I did there?
Diversify and stop hating. The sooner you pidgeon hole your likes and dislikes the sooner you realise you have fewer biking friends, the less haunts and events you can attend and the more you grumble in the corner about f'in rice racers or posing middle aged chop lovers. Enjoy bikes for bikes and stop worrying about what other people are up to.
Posted: 20/02/2011 at 18:50
Me thinks that I was a hipster... years ago! So do I get points for doing retro before it was retro?
The flannel shirt thing was because they were cheap work shirts. Pre converse baseball boots cost about £1.80 from the army stores and were made in hong kong.... and in the good old days army surplus was cheap!!! The idea was.. and still is in my case, to spend as little on clothes as possible, so there is more money for the bikes and good times.
Posted: 21/02/2011 at 20:42
Scrambler..I wish I could get why you think you're defending hipsters. By picking on the point of the OP's flannel shirt, you are actually confirming the assertion that hipsters are shallow and image-obsessed.
Please stop posting,
Please stop riding,
Please stop being an ass-chewing, cum-sponging, thunder-cunt.
xxx
Posted: 02/01/2012 at 19:17
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