Buy one bag of chicken crisps 35-45p
Eat crisps
Place knob in empty crisp bag
Give the missus a good tubbing wearing crisp bag
Whip yer old chap out before moment of pending arrival
Shove it in her gob (now she can't moan about taste)
Place crisp bag in jeans pocket before washing
ready for use next lunchtime
only 1/3 of the price:smoke: :smoke: :smoke:

If at first you don't succeed give her the elbow.
My standards are low and i don't go above 'em for no f**ker.
*STRAIGHTLINE RACING*