Ray here folks, and as the year's end approaches I think back over a lot of good and bad bike TV.
One of the best but most gruelling days, with lots of live action, repeats of live action, and old film of James Tonkland winning races was Brands Hatch World Supers on Eurosport, with Tony, the most inflatable Carter since fab Chris anchoring a six hour bike fest.
The MCN man, his striped shirt, and his studio guests were relaxed in what appeared to be a part of recycled and battered exhibition stand from the 1980 Motor Show, or could it have been the conversation pit at Hair-net's? Only joking Roger, we know that these well worn settees once advertised by Linda Barker and that brother out of Depèche Mode were, and probably still are festering in a damp mobile home laid up in a inner city industrial estate waiting for next year.
This was to be our Boys' big push, the British round and with the Tour de Junkies finished, the Channel had airtime to burn, but when regular sideman Jimmy Witt pulled a sickie, commentator 'Captain' Burnicle was left with only his encyclopaedic knowledge of freestyle motocross to call on.
Fortunately, veteran of a hundred expert opinion spots and MC-Newt back pages, the lantern jawed ex hod carrier and superbike champ Neil Hog could be promoted from yesterday's portacabin studio slot to the old seadog's side.
Probably briefed to stop Jack's excessive praise of the free lunches he used to scoff at Team Froggy and his tearful descriptions of the lovliness and purity of riders' wives and children, poor old Hog could only be grateful for the work with apparently not much on at the time apart from a rumoured ride for a rumoured Team Froggy sometime in the future.
Back in the studio his place on the couch was taken by another regular Chris Stalker, who seemed to know a lot - maybe that's why he still had a half decent ride in BSB, was writing a book and had just married a glamorous teenage bride, despite rumours of his ownership of a senior citizen bus pass and a decaying self portrait in the attic.
Out on track we saw Neil's erstwhile apprentice when he had been the main man at the Humberside Motorcycle Charm School, James 'Pianiste' Tonkland doing the business, in fact the whole TV program was a consecration of Honky Tonk's celebrity and future place in the heart of the Nation, a winner about to move on to the heady heights of MotoGP and another musical duet with Jules "I had a Hesketh" Holland.
So versatile was he that after assuming the usual role of the Coldstream Guards Brass Band and belting out the National Anthem on his piano he dominated both races and then performed a wart free strip tease which showed that Honky has been put together from the most perfect components available to medical science and will certainly stand out amongst most of the Dr Costa rebuilds in MotoGP.
Will he spend a couple of seasons there hoping to make friends with Valentino before doing a season in AMA? It's one possibility but Captain Jack wasn't asking Neil in their post race analysis of the day's events. I think he was just hoping that Hog got the Froggy ride next year so he could pitch up for more free food.
Certainly a day worth remembering although I have to admit nodding off a couple of times between elevenses and tea-time. Now we know that Hog has jetted off to the Home of the Free, Stalker's a year younger and caught the train to World Supersport, and Team Froggy's taking another sabbatical.
Twas ever thus.
