All the inside racing gossip that's fit to print from Mike Scott, TWO's GP paddock oracle
He also complained about the paddock atmosphere, having got the cold shoulder from the precious drivers who do so much to make F1 so very, very dull.
Their leader Michael Schumacher popped in to the Italian GP for a go on the Marlboro Ducati two-seater behind Randy Mamola, and might have found the opposite - the fawning around him was positively sick-making.
Comments attributed to the cheating German, about what a big fan he was of MotoGP, rang a little hollow after former World Champion Kenny Roberts came up and glad-handed him before the ride. A bemused Schumacher turned to a flunkey, and said: "Who was that?"
Never mind. Kenny's a film star now anyway, thanks to a new MotoGP movie being made, with him as the stunt double for the (as yet un-named) hero. Thus Kenny and his team found themselves in the livery of an all-new sponsor, Venture Petroleum.
Sadly, it's all Hollywood flim-flam, rather than somebody bringing real money to his father's financially beleaguered team. It's all in the script of Velocity - which also finds Kenny's character winning the World Championship. Hope somebody tells Rossi and the others.
Strong words from back-of-the-grid merchants Team Pramac d'Antin, blaming hapless Dunlop for their bad results at Mugello and elsewhere. The team accused them of ignoring their agreement by giving Dunlop-Yamaha rider Carlos Checa a different specification of tyre, and threatened legal action if they didn't achieve satisfaction.
Dunlop maintained a dignified silence. They are battling to regain lost ground against the rampant Michelin and Bridgestone, with their backing of Checa and his factory Yamaha. But it can surely not escape notice that if Checa does have a different tyre choice, he is actually on a different kind of motorcycle from the Spanish team manager's Ducatis.
Much more of this sort of talk, however, and we can imagine the d'Antin Ducatis of luckless German Alex Hofmann and "I paid for my ride" Jose Luis Cardoso might yet complete the season running on their wheel-rims.
What price your own factory MotoGP team? Cheaper by the year, thanks to a bargain precedent set by Rizla Suzuki.
Rumours of the actual price run between £1.5-mill for two years and double that figure. Either way, it's a record low for full livery. All the better for Rizla, it coincides with one of Suzuki's periodic upturns in achievement. A good score.
The words of one rival team manager reflect the reaction in the paddock. "How can anyone ask for realistic money when a factory team is going so cheap?"
Talmacsi by name, Talmacsi by nature. (But only if Talmacsi means 'luckless' in his native Hungarian.)
Last year, Hungary's only current-generation racer Gabor Talmacsi shot himself in the foot by beating factory KTM team-mate Mika Kallio at Qatar. It cost Kallio the title, and cost Gabor his job.
After being rescued by a Hungarian Honda team, he gratefully agreed to ride a road bike for some publicity shots, then turned up to the Italian GP with a nasty shoulder injury. He had fallen off.
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